Miss America Meets Little Miss Mini Maid

Gianna cozying up with the judge
Miss Elizabeth from Romper Room

People often say that I have a former beauty queen vibe, that I am a picture of pure feminity.  The truth is, they’re right; I was born to ride the pageant train. I knew at the tender age of four as my tiny fingers wrapped around that bouquet of runner up flowers (rot in hell adorable winner #10!) the pageant loss would haunt me forever (and by haunt I mean scar).

Kate Shindle

I tell you this as an introduction to a book that I should have written but, unfortunately, Kate Shindle beat me to the punch. When I look at Kate it’s like looking in a mirror.  A couple of old pageant broads! Me, fresh from (in some circles forty years is still mighty fresh) the world famous Little Miss Mini Maid Contest (sponsored by Carson Pirie Scott – talk about fresh) and Kate, the 1998 Miss America Pageant winner. Like looking in a mirror…

Kate’s book, Being Miss America: Behind the Rhinestone Curtain, is part pageant history and part memoir. For example you’d be surprised to know that the pageant was started pretty much for the same reason Facebook was started: to ogle women and advertise stuff.  In the book, Kate insinuates that the pageant is a bit antiquated. As an example she tells the story of traveling to communities all over the country to talk about HIV and AIDS prevention (her platform in 1998 and still her passion today). The Pageant thought that was great but they asked her to not use the word "condom." I know, what’s so antiquated about that?  She also thinks having women parade around in bikinis in order to receive a college scholarship is…. I want to say antiquated again, but let’s just say, icky. Like we say in the Little Miss Mini Maid circles, "why in the world is someone over the age of seven even in a bikini?"  Weird.

I was robbed! (of a childhood)

I like to call Being Miss America a thinking woman’s history of the pageant. It’s not dismissive of pageant history, nor the platform and opportunities it afforded Kate, including helping pay her way through Northwestern University (yea, Shindle’s no dummy).  Her relationship with winning Miss America is complicated to say the least. She is thoughtful, fair, and honest in this really well written memoir. Oh, and now that the book is out in the world, she is totally on the Miss America Pageant’s shit list…which I sort of love her for.

Kate created a stir by not wearing
the crown in this official photo

Speaking of loving her, Kate came to Austin to meet with the publicity and marketing departments at the press. I am in the sales department but you can bet I hightailed my lesbian ass right on into that meeting.  I sat close enough to her to hold hands…which in hindsight I can see  that it made her uncomfortable every time I stretched my hand out and tried to touch hers.  Anyway, I would say we were about seven minutes into the meeting when Kate dropped the F-bomb. I couldn’t help but think…put a Johnny Walker in one hand and a cigarette in the other, and man o man, I could absolutely fall in love. Now that’s a Miss America I can get behind (but have been asked to stay at least 500 yards from. And by "asked" I mean ordered by a court).

Holiday Gift Picks 2013: Viva Tequila

Okay, I am about to make your holiday season perfectly stress free. Not possible? Oh but it is. All you have to do is serve your family a few recipes from Viva Tequila: Cocktails, Cooking, and other Agave Adventures. You may have been thinking that you could only get shit faced from slamming a few shots of  tequila, turns out....you can eat the stuff too.

So not only will you be able to maintain a nice holiday buzz, but you can mellow out the in-laws too! Viva Tequila offers recipes from appetizers to desserts, I mean  you can literally keep the kin liquored up for days on end for a mere $35!

Seriously, this is a truly interesting book that not only includes agave recipes, but the history of agave, and some fascinating stuff about tequila in general (like how to pick good brand, what the color means, and you know... sip it!).

Two Prospectors: The Letters of Sam Shepard and Johnny Dark

I’ve read Two Prospectors: The Letters of Sam Shepard and Johnny Dark in three different incarnations. First, as a pretty rough manuscript--the letters weren’t annotated and there weren’t that many photographs.  The second time was after editorial put the final touches on it and included some great photos by Johnny Dark. I actually hadn’t planned on reading the finished book, but when I held it in my hands and starting looking at what the designer had put together, I just couldn’t help myself. The end pages, the touches of color introducing each letter, and the accompanying copy of the actual handwritten letters are perfection.  I have never had the experience of following a book this closely; it’s been incredible watching this book take shape and I honestly think it is the best trade book the University of Texas Press has done.

Sam,  Johnny, and Jesse
(Shepard's son) mid 1980's

This book of letters, which covers the forty plus year friendship of Pulitzer Prize winning writer Sam Shepard and his best friend Johnny Dark (best friend and father in law of sorts, Sam marries Dark’s stepdaughter). I often describe this book as a coming of age story about two men who never really grew up.  While the letters back and forth are sometimes light-hearted, the bulk of these are introspective and brutally honest. Each man searching for some sort of success and happiness, whether it is love, work, or a sense of freedom. Shepard, to put it mildly, is a complicated man. It’s his drinking that costs him most, but when you get a glimpse of his relationship with his father, Shepard seems to be waiting for some sort of acknowledgement and love from his father, but it’s elusive. It’s clear that this is what has shaped the man he is. It’s a heartbreaker.

Jesse and Sam 1979

The letters begin just as Shepard is ramping up a career as a playwright, they cover his affair (and life long friendship) with Patti Smith, and then his decision to leave his wife and child and begin a relationship with Jessica Lange. The letters are current; in fact they not only cover Shepard’s painful separation and later divorce from Jessica Lange, but the emotional toll putting the book together takes on Shepard and his friendship with Dark. Take a look at the book trailer here.

One last thing; a documentary called Shepard and Dark was filmed while Sam and Johnny were putting the book together. It’s a fascinating look at these two vastly different but forever-linked men. I highly recommend it.